Treat Yourself

How do you reward yourself for a job well done?

Apr 09, 2025

I am notoriously bad at celebrating my wins. Usually when I hit a deadline or some other kind of milestone (publishing a new book, getting a promotion, back when I worked in tech), I’d make a point of celebrating verbally (I did it! Yay! Go me!) and then move on after approximately sixty seconds. In other words, I didn’t come close to actually absorbing the win. I celebrated in word alone, not in heart and spirit.

It’s something I’ve gotten better at since 1) therapy and 2) research for Rest Easy, and learning about something called “productivity dysmorphia” thanks to

Anna Codrea-Rado

. I’m more aware than ever that blasting through high points just feeds that internal beast to do more, more, more. It’s not healthy for my psyche or my health to just do, do, do. So I try now to slow down and really let the achievement s i n k i n.

Today I had a personal milestone. I have been working on a new book project for months, and have set myself various deadlines in the past six months and then cruised right passed them. I like to think of myself as being pretty good at hitting deadlines, but this project has been a doozy. It’s stretched me in ways I didn’t expect. But last week, I had a breakthrough. And then another breakthrough. And another. And suddenly the pieces started falling into place after months of trying to wedge them in. (Lesson 1: Let it go. Step away. Take a break. Lesson 2: Get over yourself and do the damn thing.)

Now, mercifully, I’m on the other side of it. (Until the next deadline, as my husband likes to remind me.) And I’m trying to really savor this win. I started the day with a congratulatory pastry. I picked up a book I’d been wanting to read for some time. I shared the news with loved ones and watched the celebration emojis roll in. I even silently thanked myself for all my hard work. These are small but important ways of making space to appreciate all the effort I put in to get here.

What do you do to celebrate your wins? Take yourself out for something sweet? Buy yourself something pretty? Give yourself permission to binge watch your favorite TV show or read through your TBR pile all day? I’d love to hear your suggestions in the comments.

✨The Life Audit update

I can’t believe it’s been over six months since The Life Audit hit stores! If you’ve had a chance to buy the book or take it out from your local library, thank you! If you’ve enjoyed the book and gained value from The Life Audit, I hope you’ll consider dropping a quick rating or review here. (Note: You don’t have to write a full review if you’re feeling shy—a simple star rating will do!) Ratings and reviews help boost visibility so that more readers can discover for themselves what makes this method so magical. My goal is to get to 50 ratings or reviews for the book and journal each to help get the word out and improve discoverability; if you like The Life Audit and what it has to offer, please drop a rating or review for the book here and journal here.

📚 What I’m reading

Home Before Dark, by Riley Sager. Years ago I stumbled upon some research from psychologist Daniel Gilbert about how humans underestimate their likelihood to change. Even though we know we’ve changed in the past (just look at Present You compared to Teenage You, or even College You), we tend to think that at a certain point (adulthood? midlife? post-grad?) we stop changing. But research shows that we really do continue changing, and if I look at my hobbies and interests, I can definitely see that that’s true. While I’ve always loved reading, it wasn’t until last year that I started reading horror. It’s with great surprise to me, a veritable scaredy-cat, that I come to you today recommending a haunted house story from Riley Sager, known for his page-turning horror stories—proof that our tastes and interests really can change years later!
The book alternates chapters between the main character, Maggie, and her father, the author of a bestselling book about the haunted house Maggie and her family once lived in and fled from in the middle of the night, back when Maggie was a young child. Now, adult Maggie is set to renovate the so-called haunted house before selling it. But the longer she stays, the weirder things get, and Maggie starts to wonder if the house might be haunted after all. Recommend!

💌 Thanks as always for reading along and supporting my work. If you like what you see, hit the heart button, drop a comment, or share this with someone you think will love it, too. You can order my new book or journal or book me for a speaking event here. 💌